The Lesser of Two Feebles

Heads THEY win,
Tails WE lose.

Congratulations America! We have all nearly survived another election. It was a campaign filled with the usual amount of ads, way too much irrelevant news coverage, false promises, and "guilt by association" tactics. It has been ballyhooed as the "Most Important election of our time"!

Yes, until the next one. Aren't they all important? They should be.

In one corner, the GOP put up a candidate by default. McCain won the nomination somehow and actually has made an otherwise ho-hum campaign extremely significant by sharply selecting Sarah Palin as his running mate. Ya'll know Sarah. She is that conservative woman who supports family and life and small government and actually wants to give money back to her constituents. She is "that" woman who Liberals loathe and Hollywood snobs attempt to dismiss.

And yet she sustains, more qualified to govern than the other party's top dog, and respected and cheered by the American's who still think for themselves. Yes, we are still out there.

Then, there is Obama. The young and aspiring senator from Illinois who brought his boyhood dreams of utopia to the biggest stage in the land. True, he can orate with the best in the business these days (that doesn't say much). True also that he loves to hear his own voice.

Accomplishments? We're still waiting. Solutions? Who knows? I will give him this though, in a year where just about ANY Democrat nominee was best poised to win on a "Bush is the devil!" push for White House, it was Barack Obama who seized the brass ring. For that alone, he has earned a distinction.

Soon, the polls will close and we can all get back to life without being inundated with docudrama commercials and political pundits 101. November sweeps on TV can likely still salvage some viewers by resurrecting Heroes, a special 2-hour "24" movie on FOX, and the push for the playoffs in the NFL. We should all look forward to and treasure the pending Holiday season and bear in mind that we have survived elections before and will survive this as well.

Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus, and yes, Virginia elections really do come to a close.

For George W. Bush, the nightmare is almost over. As for the rest of us, it may only be beginning. America will choose Obama or McCain tonight, and Campaign 2008 can be remembered as that time where we had to choose "the lesser of 2 Feebles"

Now, pass me the remote control. I have a ton of DVR shows to watch all night long!

The Liberal's Worst Case Scenario

Friendly advice to the Dems and Media:

Keep taking the bait - - PLEASE!

A funny thing happened on the way to Barack's coronation cruise - he and his party missed the whole boat. While I am no history major, I don't think I have ever studied a US Presidential race in which the entire strategy is to destroy the person at the bottom of the other ticket.

I mean it is still Obama and McCain who want to commander-in-chief, right? And forgive me for stating the obvious but there has got to be a reason why the gameshow Jeopardy doesn't often have a category called "Memorable VPs". Don't get me wrong though, if Sarah Palin truly does giftwrap an election victory for John McCain she will be clearly be in a category all her own.

To his credit Barack initially tried to take the high road. Albeit after he let his loose lips make that regrettable remark about Palin being the mayor of a "small" town. Life is so tough when you're off the teleprompter. When the news of her daughter's pregnancy was released questions from the liberals and their media machine responded in lockstep. Leave it to the feminist Dems to always equate the words pregnancy and scandel in the same soundbite. Unless of course its regarding the altar boy John Edwards. Barack, clearly still reeling from his "small town" condemnation, immediately tried to curtail "his people" by vehemently chastising those that would stoop so low as to bring a candidates family into the spotlight. He bellowed that all such tactics were OFF LIMITS. Sadly Mr. Obama it seems that even your own camp, worshippers, and media nitwits don't listen to you either.

And that was only the beginning of what figures to be a nonstop assault on that women from Alaska who has turned the polls, the election, and the Obama war room completely upside down. One month ago, with neither candidate having announced a VP it appeared to many, including myself that the young senator from Illinois may actually win comfortably. Obama announced his VP choice, Joe Biden and lost points in the polls. The Dems flocked to Denver for their dog and pony show and after Barack's acceptance speech you had liberal media pundits all over salivating over their time on top. Astronomical predictions of a 15 point poll bounce for Obama was all but guaranteed. He got a 4 point bounce.

Then, Sarah Palin was announced by John McCain as the maverick woman from great state of Alaska to be his VP. And the whole race changed. Palin represents everything that the heart and soul of the GOP has adhered to during its greatest success. In the spirit of Ronald Reagan, truly the great communicator, Palin embodies all of those qualities that makes America great.

The Liberals wasted little time in scouring the globe in an effort to smear and undermine her.

The biased media machine went into overdrive. Magazines revealed their true colors. Bitter, frustrated Democratic women rallied together to once again make it clear that they are not pro-woman unless the woman champions abortion, gay rights, and bigger government.

Thus far, after digging and digging for dirt on Sarah Palin the liberals Dems are ready to convict the GOP Vice Presidential candidate for crimes of an intolerable nature. They wail on and on every day over items that they have been able to uncover. First, the bitter left had problems accepting the fact that Governor Palin had recently given birth to a beautiful baby boy afflicted with Downs Syndrome. Some idiots deluded themselves into hoping that it was not her baby, but perhaps her daughters. Others bemoaned how selfishly she allowed the child to be born anyway.

The second supposed sin of Sarah Palin was that her daughter, Bristol, was unwed and pregnant. The 17 year old daughter of the governor had decided to keep the baby and eventually marry her boyfriend. To the Liberal media this was insane. Sour ladies across the party were mystified at how any family could be so happy about the tragedy that they consider pregnancy.

So what are we left with? After all this fuss, we are left with a woman who had the knowledge and ability to abort a Downs Syndrome baby but instead chose life. We also have a set of parents whose unwed teenage daughter got pregnant and chose not only to have and raise the child but to eventually marry the father. What was the crime of parent Palin? Unconditional love and acceptance of the situation at hand. The Liberal media and whacked out Dems have ignored the will of their "chosen one" and worked tirelessly to smear and degrade Sarah Palin. And sadly for Barack it continues to backfire. What they label as dirt and scandal, the compassionate, conservative heart of this country calls moral character, respect for all life, and unconditional love and acceptance.

The more the Democrats spit and snarl and spew out their hatred and fear of Sarah Palin, the more America starts to feel nauseated. And the GOP smiles. Barack told them, ordered them to keep it clean, leave the family out of it, talk about the real issues, but his party and his people blew him off. And the GOP smiles. No doubt the Republican nominee for VP will continue to be the recipient of baseless allegations, left field character attacks, and glib one-liners from fearful, bitter liberals. John McCain hopes they keep taking the bait. I hope they keep taking the bait. Sarah Palin has completely knocked the Democratic party into a nosedive and November is not that far away.

Hope lives.

Democrat Night 2: For whom the bell tolls???

Give 'em hell Hillary!!

Accordingly, Mrs. Obama came out on Monday night and played her role. It wasn't that memorable of a speech but she showed that she can read well. Mrs. Obama showed just enough support and admiration for her hubbie as most people could stomach ( I mean nobody will mistake it for the smoochfest of Al and Tipper :-0 ) but she played the "good cop"
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To quote that Graceland poet Presley, "then came Act 2, you seemed to change, you acted strange, and why? I'll never know" Now, I am by no means a political operative the likes of Karl Rove or James Carville, those dudes are legendary, BUT, if I were Howard Dean (scary thought) I would immediately put Act 2 in motion, Hillary Rodham Clinton - BAD COP.
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Think about it, she harbors some 18 million voters who know they got played by their own system. Ole Mrs. Bill had more delegates stolen than Rev. Wright's "building fund" She mopped the floor with her party's "chosen one" for about 6 months in a row. She ran out of time and everyone in Denver knows it.
But tonight is her night. She can deliver one of those memorable fire and brimstone speeches like Grandma Richards. Just as Mrs. Obama played nice, I would hope that Billary will get down and dirty.
Lament on and on about Iraq, and the economy, and gas prices, and healthcare, and global warming, and earthquakes, and snakes, and locusts. She will find some way to link it all to President Bush and the GOP.
She will rant on and on about how bad things are, how weak our country is, and how SHE can, oops, wait, she is out. She will say how the guy she chewed up and spit out for 18 months is suddenly the man with the plan.
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If they really want to WIN the White House, that is what I would do tonight. Release the pit bull of the party, and let Hillary take it to the Republicans. "There will be blood"
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Then, good ole boy Bill can take the stage tomorrow night, "feel everyones pain" and let the healing begin. He can be that bridge over troubled waters and set his party up for the speech of speeches. The Golden Boy, er, Bronze Boy, can accept the nomination on Thursday night.
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Like I said, I am no political expert, but thats what I would do if I had Hillary in the bullpen.
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Lets see if they're playing to win or just to keep it close . . again.

Democrat Mission 08: "humanize" Obamas - - good idea!

"Remember, its smile AND wave, not just wave"

OK, so it has been awhile since I felt like posting. Admit it, the past 2-3 months of summer have been pretty much dullsville even for the most tried and true political junkie.

I think the hilight came down to a clever McCain ad that included 2 seconds of tabloid roadkill
Paris Hilton and Brittny Spears and 25 seconds ridiculing Barack for being anti-drilling, drooling to raise taxes on the only people surviving the stumbling economy, and having no original ideas on alternative energy. The Obama response? ...freak out over the 2 seconds comparison to the flash-over-substance ladies, and tactfully stay silent about the real issues the ad raised. I mean who would want to know what his solutions are as long as he keeps reading well, and laughs at his own smarmy quips at press junkets?

But here we are after Night 1 of the much anticipated "week of hopes and dreams" that is the Dem Convention and what is the prevalent talking point from the Democrats??? How HUMAN the Michelle and Barack appeared!! To quote one Dem, Its very important that we come out of this convention and "humanize" Barack Obama to the American people.

I was stunned. I don't think I have ever heard a campaign admit that there primary definition of success is that they were able to humanize their candidate. Why would you ever feel the need to do that. I mean, he is human right? Surely after "Algore" they realized that running stiff, wooden people won't work.

I was not satisfied; however with merely one strategist applauding the humanness of Obama. I deliberately forced my TV to CNN. I just had to watch some of that rose-colored crooked and off-center commentators and see who would be smiling the biggest. Sure enough it was the lovefest I expected. Paul Bigala was drug out of mothballs and once again chirping in with lofty praise after lofty praise. Anderson Cooper had finally dried off from all of that time spent in the Hurricane Katrina water and had clearly had a bit too much of the koolaid.

But then, they go to the crowd shots. Some poor field reporter for CNN who hasn't earned her stripes is stuck out with the minions on the floor. They find two Golden Girls with big hair smiling with their new adhesive dentures as they comment on the Michelle Obama speech that was badly trumped by Massachussettes icon Ted Kennedy's "to the moon Alice!" speech. These two ladies are so proud of Michelle Obama as they struggle to contain their euphoric tears of joy. And then even before any staffer could slip them a "talking points" card, one lady looks into the camera and confirms the evening mission, "Michelle did it! She was great. They really are HUMAN!!!"

Wow. What a surprise. Well, it seemed to be for her anyway.

Humanizing the candidate. Who would think it would be such a tough sell??

May Day! May Day! 3rd in a 3 part series

Obama: Is this man the New England Patriots of Campaign '08 ? ? ?

The New England Patriots were the best team in football from September through to the Super Bowl. They brought an undefeated record with them to the biggest stage in pro football. They were the favorite in every game they played. There was NO way they could lose. Oh, but they did.

The Memphis Tigers were almost as popular of a pick to win the NCAA Men's Basketball championship. They had only tasted defeat once all season as they steamrolled into the final game. All year long hoops fans were beside themselves with giddy glea as people believed that playing that one final game was all but a formality. Experts had all but crowned the Tigers as king of college roundball. But a funny thing happened on th way to their coronation - they lost.

There is a lot of pressure in being the prohibitive favorite. Ask the dashingly suave Barack Obama. He can tell you. In fact, you don't even have to ask him. The body language says it all. But as I have done so for the other 2 candidates in this marathon that we refer to as the Race for the White House, I am prepared to offer my immediate advice to Mr. Obama and his staff. Will they listen? The Conservative in me hopes not, but here goes anyhow:

For starters, how about adding some substance to all of those pep-rally snipets that roll of your tongue? For the past 5 or 6 months you don't need to attend an Obama rally, you can just replay the same one and photoshop in new crowd faces. Here we are in May for crying out loud and nobody really knows how the young senator plans on solving any of the problems he keeps whining about. Barack says crowd pleasing stuff such as, "I am and have always been against this war!" Bully for you! Me, I am against cancer! Do I have a cure for cancer? No. Do you have an ironclad solution to the war? Who knows?The American people sure don't know if you do.

Another thing that could definitely help you senator is to stick to your notes! You've got a dedicated staff all around you brimming with people who are supposed to keep you out of the minefield that is the press corps. Read the prepared statements. Stick to the text. You are an incredible reader! Your delivery is quite clear and articulate, er, I mean well-spoken. Once you start espousing your own answers and getting off point you lose people or worse, you don't lose them and they remember every single miscue and gaff. Then you're handlers have to hit all the talkshows and start saying things like "well, he meant to say....." Yeah, that looks horrible. Granted your competition is about as guilty as you in this arena, but hey, why should you care about them??

Finally, you have got to distance yourself from all the gravy-trainers. Mr. Obama you are trying to become President of the U S of A. You may not be the PAC magnet like other current and past politicians, but lets not be so foolish as to think that all of those people who are smiling and grinning and working so hard to get you into the White House don't have personal agendas much different than your own. You can start with that fame-monger Rev. Wright. Sure the guy may have been rich and wealthy before you came along, but he wasn't FAMOUS. Shoot, that loudmouth is on TV more than you. People don't embrace loudmouthed, opinionated Reverands. Your party should know all about that. Truth be told, I don't believe that the American people really care about what the well-dressed preacher from your old church thinks or says, but all they know is that he is a bag of hot air, and oh by the way, he thinks he is close to you. Break it to him gently.

Well, I hope that some of this advice was a help to you and your polticos. Lord knows it can't hurt. You are probably still the big-time favorite to win your party's nomination. You still look good. You still sound good when you stick to the script. It must feel pretty good. Just remember, the New England Patriots felt pretty darn good too when it didn't really matter.

April Fool's - - 2nd in a 3 part Series

He wants to be President

THIS MUCH......

With the aftermath of the Pennsylvania primary now a fading memory, it appears that the Chaos that has become the Democratic party will persist for awhile longer. Hillary won, and she won big. She secured more delegate, still not enough though. For media darling Barack it meant having to delay selecting curtain patterns for the Oval Office for a few more months while he and his team of "suddenly shaky" inner circle mastermind a way to make Mrs. Clinton disappear. Some of my friends snicker to themselves that this is a trick her husband would pay top dollar for. But I digress.

I have dedicated this posting towards trying to help my party's candidate shed some of the "April foolishness" that he and his handlers have been dabbling in for far too long. I offer this advice for the good of that Grand Ole Party. John McCain may not be the guy I wanted, but he is the guy I have. An old saying goes that you can pick your friends, but you can't pick your family. John McCain appears to now be my "family".

Tip #1 for Senator McCain: Enough with the tree hugging already. Yes, we know you like the "others" (the Democrats). We get it already. But, don't ever forget that Johnny, that you only get the big prize, IF, the Conservative base decides to give it to you. You see, Sen. McCain, the only way to win a presidential election is to either completely sweep your own party, OR, win most of your own party and some of theirs. Reagan was the master of this! The nostalgic term "Reagan Democrats" was a true reality. Not only did most of the Republicans adore the man, but enough Democrats broke bread with him enough to help hand him 2 landslide victories. Those were the days Johnny. And if you really want to be the next POTUS, stop preaching the "chicken little says the sky is falling" and start talking about the things Conservative Republicans want and need to hear. Tell people you want to limit government - our current President said that and people fell for it. Tell people that this War on Terrorism is not like a game of "Deal or No Deal" that will end in a convenient one hour time slot. Remind people that in today's world you're either part of the problem or part of the solution, and sitting around "HOPING" that our nation's enemies will suddenly be nice to us is being part of the problem.

Tip #2 for Senator McCain: BREATHE, and try not to look so constipated when you're annoyed.

We've all seen it. Ask Maria Shriver. You almost tore her a new one back in 2000 when she tried to interview you backstage when it was clear that your Presidential bid was fading into the sunset. Sure its a tough campaign, but that's ALL it is. If you come off looking like Jack Nicholson in "The Shining" each time a nitwit reporter asks you a dumb question, people will begin to worry that you just may crack under the pressure of being the head cheese.

Tip #3 for Senator McCain: Keep looking presidential. This is the 2nd most important thing you can do after you embrace the Conservatives. Like I stressed in Tip #1, you don't win without us. Do you REALLY think you'll get elected by counting on disenfranchised Dems to put you in office?? I hope not. Rush may not be right about everyting, but he is on this point. If you win, it will only be because enough of the Conservatives opted to play nice. If you lose, it will ultimately prove that you were not the right choice, and the party will re-tool and put the right guy forward in 2012. So, while Barack and Hillary continue to remind everyone of Punch and Judy, just keep visting foreign countries, and making speeches about the things that matter. Keep building your war chest for the big push in August. Who knows? By the time the Barack v. Hillary is decided, you may be reviewing your draft for the Inauguration - --- - - IF you follow this friendly advice.

April Fools - First in a 3 part series

With the anniversary of my 43rd year of life just a day away, it seemed as good a time as any to become a tad nostalgic. In my best effort to channel the spirit of Andy Rooney ( is he still around?) I decided to wake from my blog slumber, and take some time to analyze the 3 candidates working ever so annoyingly to secure our valuable votes. (There are still 3 viable candidates right? I did not miss the Pennsylvania Primary did I??)

After reading, watching valuable "fair and balanced" news reports, and making a concerned effort to "bRush" up on things, I saw the 3 eager senators and I could not help but be overcome with mild interest.

But, its still early. Its mid-April. All three Presidential candidates seem to be caught up in a battle to see who can avoid stumbling and gaffing their way right out of contention. And its a very close race. Sadly.

The Republicans "last man standing" is the military ambassador, John McCain. He fought for our country by proudly serving in the military. He's a hero, just ask him and he will tell you.

But, I will be issuing my tips for improvement to him in an upcoming blog installment.

Then, there is the beloved Barack Obama. The poster child for dreaming. His theme song could be that opening scene from "My Best Friend's Wedding" - - Wishing and Hoping. Good for him. Having been in the Washington world long enough for a cup of coffee, his smile still carries that starry eyed magic of a kid on Christmas morning - - right before he finds out he didn't get the new bicycle. But, my advice for good ole Barack will come later as well. He'll be around.

No friends, today is a quick and brief bit of advice for Bill's wife - Hillary. Poor Hillary. This was supposed to be her moment in the spotlight. The problem is the spotlight, turned into headlights. Yikes! A year ago, the move on. org loonies were all set to Move In to the White House and bring Hillary, Bill, and maybe even Chelsea back on Glory Road. A funny thing happened on the way to the inauguration however, the moveon crown did move on alright, straight to the newest party darling - Obama.

I know its probably too late for Hillary, but if she sees this, or if her qualified staff happens to read this (she does still have a staff right? Is Carville still around? What about Stephanapolis?)

they can tell her this: Stick to what you know and PLEASE quit telling stories!! Sure everyone loves a good anecdote, or a gripping tale about bravery or inspiration. BUT, if you're going to tell a story, for crying out loud, tell the right story.

Remember a few weeks ago, she talked about making some visit and being in harms way with some military skirkmish going on? Later the media reported (Jon Stewart or Steven Colbert I believe) that she was really nowhere near any guns being fired or missiles launching or anything remotely threatening.

Still another time she made the blunder of stating her passion and ability to fix our country's healthcare situation. The passion is one thing, but ability?? Didn't her husband Bill make the horrible mistake of trying to convince the American people during his first term as President that she could spearhead the healthcare reform initiative?? And didn't that last all of one month before they pulled her off the case. Seriously, it blew up in her face. I think Michael Richards has had sitcoms that have lasted longer than her reign as Healthcare Guru.

SO, Hillary, with your days numbered, and the delegate count dwindling in the time it took me to write this posting, please heed my suggestions. No one can question your desire. Even your staunchest critics can't argue with your quest to lead this country. You do know how the game is played in Washington DC. Your Democrat counterpart is still reading the rules. You've got to take the fight to Mr. Obama and do it fast. You've been around a long time. You've probably forgotten more decision makers in DC than the youngling Barack has even met. Plus, if you do somehow attain the Democratic nomination at the Convention, you can go to the White House and utilize all of those connections that you and hubby William Jefferson have acquired all these years. And, they will be willing to work with you. After all, the other Democrat running has been selling the American people on how much he distances himself from "old Washington" - - and don't think they'll forget that.

But Mrs. Clinton, please, quit telling those stories.