The Lesser of Two Feebles

Heads THEY win,
Tails WE lose.

Congratulations America! We have all nearly survived another election. It was a campaign filled with the usual amount of ads, way too much irrelevant news coverage, false promises, and "guilt by association" tactics. It has been ballyhooed as the "Most Important election of our time"!

Yes, until the next one. Aren't they all important? They should be.

In one corner, the GOP put up a candidate by default. McCain won the nomination somehow and actually has made an otherwise ho-hum campaign extremely significant by sharply selecting Sarah Palin as his running mate. Ya'll know Sarah. She is that conservative woman who supports family and life and small government and actually wants to give money back to her constituents. She is "that" woman who Liberals loathe and Hollywood snobs attempt to dismiss.

And yet she sustains, more qualified to govern than the other party's top dog, and respected and cheered by the American's who still think for themselves. Yes, we are still out there.

Then, there is Obama. The young and aspiring senator from Illinois who brought his boyhood dreams of utopia to the biggest stage in the land. True, he can orate with the best in the business these days (that doesn't say much). True also that he loves to hear his own voice.

Accomplishments? We're still waiting. Solutions? Who knows? I will give him this though, in a year where just about ANY Democrat nominee was best poised to win on a "Bush is the devil!" push for White House, it was Barack Obama who seized the brass ring. For that alone, he has earned a distinction.

Soon, the polls will close and we can all get back to life without being inundated with docudrama commercials and political pundits 101. November sweeps on TV can likely still salvage some viewers by resurrecting Heroes, a special 2-hour "24" movie on FOX, and the push for the playoffs in the NFL. We should all look forward to and treasure the pending Holiday season and bear in mind that we have survived elections before and will survive this as well.

Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus, and yes, Virginia elections really do come to a close.

For George W. Bush, the nightmare is almost over. As for the rest of us, it may only be beginning. America will choose Obama or McCain tonight, and Campaign 2008 can be remembered as that time where we had to choose "the lesser of 2 Feebles"

Now, pass me the remote control. I have a ton of DVR shows to watch all night long!

The Liberal's Worst Case Scenario

Friendly advice to the Dems and Media:

Keep taking the bait - - PLEASE!

A funny thing happened on the way to Barack's coronation cruise - he and his party missed the whole boat. While I am no history major, I don't think I have ever studied a US Presidential race in which the entire strategy is to destroy the person at the bottom of the other ticket.

I mean it is still Obama and McCain who want to commander-in-chief, right? And forgive me for stating the obvious but there has got to be a reason why the gameshow Jeopardy doesn't often have a category called "Memorable VPs". Don't get me wrong though, if Sarah Palin truly does giftwrap an election victory for John McCain she will be clearly be in a category all her own.

To his credit Barack initially tried to take the high road. Albeit after he let his loose lips make that regrettable remark about Palin being the mayor of a "small" town. Life is so tough when you're off the teleprompter. When the news of her daughter's pregnancy was released questions from the liberals and their media machine responded in lockstep. Leave it to the feminist Dems to always equate the words pregnancy and scandel in the same soundbite. Unless of course its regarding the altar boy John Edwards. Barack, clearly still reeling from his "small town" condemnation, immediately tried to curtail "his people" by vehemently chastising those that would stoop so low as to bring a candidates family into the spotlight. He bellowed that all such tactics were OFF LIMITS. Sadly Mr. Obama it seems that even your own camp, worshippers, and media nitwits don't listen to you either.

And that was only the beginning of what figures to be a nonstop assault on that women from Alaska who has turned the polls, the election, and the Obama war room completely upside down. One month ago, with neither candidate having announced a VP it appeared to many, including myself that the young senator from Illinois may actually win comfortably. Obama announced his VP choice, Joe Biden and lost points in the polls. The Dems flocked to Denver for their dog and pony show and after Barack's acceptance speech you had liberal media pundits all over salivating over their time on top. Astronomical predictions of a 15 point poll bounce for Obama was all but guaranteed. He got a 4 point bounce.

Then, Sarah Palin was announced by John McCain as the maverick woman from great state of Alaska to be his VP. And the whole race changed. Palin represents everything that the heart and soul of the GOP has adhered to during its greatest success. In the spirit of Ronald Reagan, truly the great communicator, Palin embodies all of those qualities that makes America great.

The Liberals wasted little time in scouring the globe in an effort to smear and undermine her.

The biased media machine went into overdrive. Magazines revealed their true colors. Bitter, frustrated Democratic women rallied together to once again make it clear that they are not pro-woman unless the woman champions abortion, gay rights, and bigger government.

Thus far, after digging and digging for dirt on Sarah Palin the liberals Dems are ready to convict the GOP Vice Presidential candidate for crimes of an intolerable nature. They wail on and on every day over items that they have been able to uncover. First, the bitter left had problems accepting the fact that Governor Palin had recently given birth to a beautiful baby boy afflicted with Downs Syndrome. Some idiots deluded themselves into hoping that it was not her baby, but perhaps her daughters. Others bemoaned how selfishly she allowed the child to be born anyway.

The second supposed sin of Sarah Palin was that her daughter, Bristol, was unwed and pregnant. The 17 year old daughter of the governor had decided to keep the baby and eventually marry her boyfriend. To the Liberal media this was insane. Sour ladies across the party were mystified at how any family could be so happy about the tragedy that they consider pregnancy.

So what are we left with? After all this fuss, we are left with a woman who had the knowledge and ability to abort a Downs Syndrome baby but instead chose life. We also have a set of parents whose unwed teenage daughter got pregnant and chose not only to have and raise the child but to eventually marry the father. What was the crime of parent Palin? Unconditional love and acceptance of the situation at hand. The Liberal media and whacked out Dems have ignored the will of their "chosen one" and worked tirelessly to smear and degrade Sarah Palin. And sadly for Barack it continues to backfire. What they label as dirt and scandal, the compassionate, conservative heart of this country calls moral character, respect for all life, and unconditional love and acceptance.

The more the Democrats spit and snarl and spew out their hatred and fear of Sarah Palin, the more America starts to feel nauseated. And the GOP smiles. Barack told them, ordered them to keep it clean, leave the family out of it, talk about the real issues, but his party and his people blew him off. And the GOP smiles. No doubt the Republican nominee for VP will continue to be the recipient of baseless allegations, left field character attacks, and glib one-liners from fearful, bitter liberals. John McCain hopes they keep taking the bait. I hope they keep taking the bait. Sarah Palin has completely knocked the Democratic party into a nosedive and November is not that far away.

Hope lives.

Democrat Night 2: For whom the bell tolls???

Give 'em hell Hillary!!

Accordingly, Mrs. Obama came out on Monday night and played her role. It wasn't that memorable of a speech but she showed that she can read well. Mrs. Obama showed just enough support and admiration for her hubbie as most people could stomach ( I mean nobody will mistake it for the smoochfest of Al and Tipper :-0 ) but she played the "good cop"
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To quote that Graceland poet Presley, "then came Act 2, you seemed to change, you acted strange, and why? I'll never know" Now, I am by no means a political operative the likes of Karl Rove or James Carville, those dudes are legendary, BUT, if I were Howard Dean (scary thought) I would immediately put Act 2 in motion, Hillary Rodham Clinton - BAD COP.
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Think about it, she harbors some 18 million voters who know they got played by their own system. Ole Mrs. Bill had more delegates stolen than Rev. Wright's "building fund" She mopped the floor with her party's "chosen one" for about 6 months in a row. She ran out of time and everyone in Denver knows it.
But tonight is her night. She can deliver one of those memorable fire and brimstone speeches like Grandma Richards. Just as Mrs. Obama played nice, I would hope that Billary will get down and dirty.
Lament on and on about Iraq, and the economy, and gas prices, and healthcare, and global warming, and earthquakes, and snakes, and locusts. She will find some way to link it all to President Bush and the GOP.
She will rant on and on about how bad things are, how weak our country is, and how SHE can, oops, wait, she is out. She will say how the guy she chewed up and spit out for 18 months is suddenly the man with the plan.
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If they really want to WIN the White House, that is what I would do tonight. Release the pit bull of the party, and let Hillary take it to the Republicans. "There will be blood"
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Then, good ole boy Bill can take the stage tomorrow night, "feel everyones pain" and let the healing begin. He can be that bridge over troubled waters and set his party up for the speech of speeches. The Golden Boy, er, Bronze Boy, can accept the nomination on Thursday night.
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Like I said, I am no political expert, but thats what I would do if I had Hillary in the bullpen.
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Lets see if they're playing to win or just to keep it close . . again.

Democrat Mission 08: "humanize" Obamas - - good idea!

"Remember, its smile AND wave, not just wave"

OK, so it has been awhile since I felt like posting. Admit it, the past 2-3 months of summer have been pretty much dullsville even for the most tried and true political junkie.

I think the hilight came down to a clever McCain ad that included 2 seconds of tabloid roadkill
Paris Hilton and Brittny Spears and 25 seconds ridiculing Barack for being anti-drilling, drooling to raise taxes on the only people surviving the stumbling economy, and having no original ideas on alternative energy. The Obama response? ...freak out over the 2 seconds comparison to the flash-over-substance ladies, and tactfully stay silent about the real issues the ad raised. I mean who would want to know what his solutions are as long as he keeps reading well, and laughs at his own smarmy quips at press junkets?

But here we are after Night 1 of the much anticipated "week of hopes and dreams" that is the Dem Convention and what is the prevalent talking point from the Democrats??? How HUMAN the Michelle and Barack appeared!! To quote one Dem, Its very important that we come out of this convention and "humanize" Barack Obama to the American people.

I was stunned. I don't think I have ever heard a campaign admit that there primary definition of success is that they were able to humanize their candidate. Why would you ever feel the need to do that. I mean, he is human right? Surely after "Algore" they realized that running stiff, wooden people won't work.

I was not satisfied; however with merely one strategist applauding the humanness of Obama. I deliberately forced my TV to CNN. I just had to watch some of that rose-colored crooked and off-center commentators and see who would be smiling the biggest. Sure enough it was the lovefest I expected. Paul Bigala was drug out of mothballs and once again chirping in with lofty praise after lofty praise. Anderson Cooper had finally dried off from all of that time spent in the Hurricane Katrina water and had clearly had a bit too much of the koolaid.

But then, they go to the crowd shots. Some poor field reporter for CNN who hasn't earned her stripes is stuck out with the minions on the floor. They find two Golden Girls with big hair smiling with their new adhesive dentures as they comment on the Michelle Obama speech that was badly trumped by Massachussettes icon Ted Kennedy's "to the moon Alice!" speech. These two ladies are so proud of Michelle Obama as they struggle to contain their euphoric tears of joy. And then even before any staffer could slip them a "talking points" card, one lady looks into the camera and confirms the evening mission, "Michelle did it! She was great. They really are HUMAN!!!"

Wow. What a surprise. Well, it seemed to be for her anyway.

Humanizing the candidate. Who would think it would be such a tough sell??

May Day! May Day! 3rd in a 3 part series

Obama: Is this man the New England Patriots of Campaign '08 ? ? ?

The New England Patriots were the best team in football from September through to the Super Bowl. They brought an undefeated record with them to the biggest stage in pro football. They were the favorite in every game they played. There was NO way they could lose. Oh, but they did.

The Memphis Tigers were almost as popular of a pick to win the NCAA Men's Basketball championship. They had only tasted defeat once all season as they steamrolled into the final game. All year long hoops fans were beside themselves with giddy glea as people believed that playing that one final game was all but a formality. Experts had all but crowned the Tigers as king of college roundball. But a funny thing happened on th way to their coronation - they lost.

There is a lot of pressure in being the prohibitive favorite. Ask the dashingly suave Barack Obama. He can tell you. In fact, you don't even have to ask him. The body language says it all. But as I have done so for the other 2 candidates in this marathon that we refer to as the Race for the White House, I am prepared to offer my immediate advice to Mr. Obama and his staff. Will they listen? The Conservative in me hopes not, but here goes anyhow:

For starters, how about adding some substance to all of those pep-rally snipets that roll of your tongue? For the past 5 or 6 months you don't need to attend an Obama rally, you can just replay the same one and photoshop in new crowd faces. Here we are in May for crying out loud and nobody really knows how the young senator plans on solving any of the problems he keeps whining about. Barack says crowd pleasing stuff such as, "I am and have always been against this war!" Bully for you! Me, I am against cancer! Do I have a cure for cancer? No. Do you have an ironclad solution to the war? Who knows?The American people sure don't know if you do.

Another thing that could definitely help you senator is to stick to your notes! You've got a dedicated staff all around you brimming with people who are supposed to keep you out of the minefield that is the press corps. Read the prepared statements. Stick to the text. You are an incredible reader! Your delivery is quite clear and articulate, er, I mean well-spoken. Once you start espousing your own answers and getting off point you lose people or worse, you don't lose them and they remember every single miscue and gaff. Then you're handlers have to hit all the talkshows and start saying things like "well, he meant to say....." Yeah, that looks horrible. Granted your competition is about as guilty as you in this arena, but hey, why should you care about them??

Finally, you have got to distance yourself from all the gravy-trainers. Mr. Obama you are trying to become President of the U S of A. You may not be the PAC magnet like other current and past politicians, but lets not be so foolish as to think that all of those people who are smiling and grinning and working so hard to get you into the White House don't have personal agendas much different than your own. You can start with that fame-monger Rev. Wright. Sure the guy may have been rich and wealthy before you came along, but he wasn't FAMOUS. Shoot, that loudmouth is on TV more than you. People don't embrace loudmouthed, opinionated Reverands. Your party should know all about that. Truth be told, I don't believe that the American people really care about what the well-dressed preacher from your old church thinks or says, but all they know is that he is a bag of hot air, and oh by the way, he thinks he is close to you. Break it to him gently.

Well, I hope that some of this advice was a help to you and your polticos. Lord knows it can't hurt. You are probably still the big-time favorite to win your party's nomination. You still look good. You still sound good when you stick to the script. It must feel pretty good. Just remember, the New England Patriots felt pretty darn good too when it didn't really matter.

April Fool's - - 2nd in a 3 part Series

He wants to be President

THIS MUCH......

With the aftermath of the Pennsylvania primary now a fading memory, it appears that the Chaos that has become the Democratic party will persist for awhile longer. Hillary won, and she won big. She secured more delegate, still not enough though. For media darling Barack it meant having to delay selecting curtain patterns for the Oval Office for a few more months while he and his team of "suddenly shaky" inner circle mastermind a way to make Mrs. Clinton disappear. Some of my friends snicker to themselves that this is a trick her husband would pay top dollar for. But I digress.

I have dedicated this posting towards trying to help my party's candidate shed some of the "April foolishness" that he and his handlers have been dabbling in for far too long. I offer this advice for the good of that Grand Ole Party. John McCain may not be the guy I wanted, but he is the guy I have. An old saying goes that you can pick your friends, but you can't pick your family. John McCain appears to now be my "family".

Tip #1 for Senator McCain: Enough with the tree hugging already. Yes, we know you like the "others" (the Democrats). We get it already. But, don't ever forget that Johnny, that you only get the big prize, IF, the Conservative base decides to give it to you. You see, Sen. McCain, the only way to win a presidential election is to either completely sweep your own party, OR, win most of your own party and some of theirs. Reagan was the master of this! The nostalgic term "Reagan Democrats" was a true reality. Not only did most of the Republicans adore the man, but enough Democrats broke bread with him enough to help hand him 2 landslide victories. Those were the days Johnny. And if you really want to be the next POTUS, stop preaching the "chicken little says the sky is falling" and start talking about the things Conservative Republicans want and need to hear. Tell people you want to limit government - our current President said that and people fell for it. Tell people that this War on Terrorism is not like a game of "Deal or No Deal" that will end in a convenient one hour time slot. Remind people that in today's world you're either part of the problem or part of the solution, and sitting around "HOPING" that our nation's enemies will suddenly be nice to us is being part of the problem.

Tip #2 for Senator McCain: BREATHE, and try not to look so constipated when you're annoyed.

We've all seen it. Ask Maria Shriver. You almost tore her a new one back in 2000 when she tried to interview you backstage when it was clear that your Presidential bid was fading into the sunset. Sure its a tough campaign, but that's ALL it is. If you come off looking like Jack Nicholson in "The Shining" each time a nitwit reporter asks you a dumb question, people will begin to worry that you just may crack under the pressure of being the head cheese.

Tip #3 for Senator McCain: Keep looking presidential. This is the 2nd most important thing you can do after you embrace the Conservatives. Like I stressed in Tip #1, you don't win without us. Do you REALLY think you'll get elected by counting on disenfranchised Dems to put you in office?? I hope not. Rush may not be right about everyting, but he is on this point. If you win, it will only be because enough of the Conservatives opted to play nice. If you lose, it will ultimately prove that you were not the right choice, and the party will re-tool and put the right guy forward in 2012. So, while Barack and Hillary continue to remind everyone of Punch and Judy, just keep visting foreign countries, and making speeches about the things that matter. Keep building your war chest for the big push in August. Who knows? By the time the Barack v. Hillary is decided, you may be reviewing your draft for the Inauguration - --- - - IF you follow this friendly advice.

April Fools - First in a 3 part series

With the anniversary of my 43rd year of life just a day away, it seemed as good a time as any to become a tad nostalgic. In my best effort to channel the spirit of Andy Rooney ( is he still around?) I decided to wake from my blog slumber, and take some time to analyze the 3 candidates working ever so annoyingly to secure our valuable votes. (There are still 3 viable candidates right? I did not miss the Pennsylvania Primary did I??)

After reading, watching valuable "fair and balanced" news reports, and making a concerned effort to "bRush" up on things, I saw the 3 eager senators and I could not help but be overcome with mild interest.

But, its still early. Its mid-April. All three Presidential candidates seem to be caught up in a battle to see who can avoid stumbling and gaffing their way right out of contention. And its a very close race. Sadly.

The Republicans "last man standing" is the military ambassador, John McCain. He fought for our country by proudly serving in the military. He's a hero, just ask him and he will tell you.

But, I will be issuing my tips for improvement to him in an upcoming blog installment.

Then, there is the beloved Barack Obama. The poster child for dreaming. His theme song could be that opening scene from "My Best Friend's Wedding" - - Wishing and Hoping. Good for him. Having been in the Washington world long enough for a cup of coffee, his smile still carries that starry eyed magic of a kid on Christmas morning - - right before he finds out he didn't get the new bicycle. But, my advice for good ole Barack will come later as well. He'll be around.

No friends, today is a quick and brief bit of advice for Bill's wife - Hillary. Poor Hillary. This was supposed to be her moment in the spotlight. The problem is the spotlight, turned into headlights. Yikes! A year ago, the move on. org loonies were all set to Move In to the White House and bring Hillary, Bill, and maybe even Chelsea back on Glory Road. A funny thing happened on the way to the inauguration however, the moveon crown did move on alright, straight to the newest party darling - Obama.

I know its probably too late for Hillary, but if she sees this, or if her qualified staff happens to read this (she does still have a staff right? Is Carville still around? What about Stephanapolis?)

they can tell her this: Stick to what you know and PLEASE quit telling stories!! Sure everyone loves a good anecdote, or a gripping tale about bravery or inspiration. BUT, if you're going to tell a story, for crying out loud, tell the right story.

Remember a few weeks ago, she talked about making some visit and being in harms way with some military skirkmish going on? Later the media reported (Jon Stewart or Steven Colbert I believe) that she was really nowhere near any guns being fired or missiles launching or anything remotely threatening.

Still another time she made the blunder of stating her passion and ability to fix our country's healthcare situation. The passion is one thing, but ability?? Didn't her husband Bill make the horrible mistake of trying to convince the American people during his first term as President that she could spearhead the healthcare reform initiative?? And didn't that last all of one month before they pulled her off the case. Seriously, it blew up in her face. I think Michael Richards has had sitcoms that have lasted longer than her reign as Healthcare Guru.

SO, Hillary, with your days numbered, and the delegate count dwindling in the time it took me to write this posting, please heed my suggestions. No one can question your desire. Even your staunchest critics can't argue with your quest to lead this country. You do know how the game is played in Washington DC. Your Democrat counterpart is still reading the rules. You've got to take the fight to Mr. Obama and do it fast. You've been around a long time. You've probably forgotten more decision makers in DC than the youngling Barack has even met. Plus, if you do somehow attain the Democratic nomination at the Convention, you can go to the White House and utilize all of those connections that you and hubby William Jefferson have acquired all these years. And, they will be willing to work with you. After all, the other Democrat running has been selling the American people on how much he distances himself from "old Washington" - - and don't think they'll forget that.

But Mrs. Clinton, please, quit telling those stories.

How to Lose an Election

"I don't belong to any organized political party," Will Rogers was reputed to have said. "I'm a Democrat."

It looked so good for us. Tired of seven years of Bush-Cheney rule, most Americans want change. They're sick of five years of war in Iraq, and worried about the economy. All seemed right in the world for a change in the White House, and we had just the Democrat for the job.

Even better, we had two Democrats, one who could become the first woman and the other the first African-American to ever hold the office. The woman was tough, experienced, and married to a popular former president, with one of the best political machines in history at her disposal. Her opponent was young, energetic, and full of charisma, with a promise of change for all those left behind by the Great American Oil Rush. And the other side nominated a 71 year-old man who even his party doesn't support, and who looks like someone you'd see driving too slowly on the highway.

How could we lose? Americans were rushing to the polls in each state's primary -- with short lines for the Republicans, and long lines for the Democrats. The race for the nomination became the top news story since early February, and all America stood watch to see who would surge ahead. We were for healthcare, better schools, an end to the war, while they were for keeping the troops right where they are, tax breaks for the rich, and drilling in Alaskan wildlife reserves.

But alas, the party that brought us John Kerry, Al Gore, Michael Dukakis and Walter Mondale has found a way to lose this one as well. First it was the red-faced sniping between Clinton and Obama supporters, who were convinced that pouring on the negatives would boost their candidate. Then, it was the fiascos in stereo that were the Florida and Michigan primaries, where the party first kicked both states out of the process, then sought a way to get them back in. After all was said and done, both Michigan and Florida responded, "Thanks, but no thanks."

Now here we are, with Obama holding a lead of about 150 pledged delegates over Clinton. It is five weeks before the Pennsylvania primary, where we have to wait to watch the voters of Pennsylvania decide. . . absolutely nothing. Then, it will be another two weeks until the North Carolina and Indiana primaries, which will decide. . . absolutely nothing. In fact, we will go through the entire fifty states, plus Guam and Puerto Rico and neither side will end up with the 2024 votes needed to win the nomination.

And that brings us to the convention in Denver. That convention will be exciting, but it will be all about superdelegates, and wondering whom each is going to vote for. And after all the time we spent listening to the candidates, watching debates, traveling to caucuses or standing in line at primaries, it will be about 800 party bigwigs who will decide whom we nominate. Hillary will likely need more votes than Obama, but she has more connections, and let's be honest, can play the game better. Obama will likely have the most popular votes, most states, and most delegates, and those superdelegates that base their decision on those factors will side with him.

Coming out of the convention, we will finally have a candidate. But we will have a split party, a whole bunch of disenfranchised rank and file voters, and only two months to run for president. That's right. Did I mention that the convention is in late August and the election is in early November? Subtract a week for the GOP convention in September, when all eyes will turn to Minneapolis and what the Republicans have to say. That leaves about seven or eight weeks to raise money, run ads, and state our case to the American people.

Meanwhile, John McCain is already doing exactly that. He is in a debate with no opponent, raising money hand over fist, and getting a free pass from the media. He is shaking hands with the president, making a trip to Iraq to meet with generals and foreign leaders, and resting his tired old bones for the short campaign ahead. The only bad day that he's had since Super Tuesday was the day that a Democrat had to explain to him that Iranians were not training al Qaeda.

This is how we manage to lose elections, people. It's not that we're being outspent. It's not that America loves Jesus. It's not even that white guys poll better than non-whites or even non-guys. It's that we can't get our act together enough to give a candidate a fighting chance against the other side. Between Howard Dean's er, leadership, and the campaigns' scorched earth mentalities, and the ridiculous rules for the process, we're going to go into the general election at a serious disadvantage that WE PUT OURSELVES IN. It's as if we were the Patriots taking on the Giants, favored by two touchdowns, and we decided to tie our own shoes together.

So, Howard, if you're out there, here's what you do. Send a letter to all of the superdelegates and tell them two things. First tell them that this is the last time they will be superdelegates. Next time around, they will have one vote in their own precinct, just like everyone else. And second, tell them that they'd better be ready to cast their vote on the day after the final primary, which is sometime in June. Once the primaries are over, they will have 24 hours to vote. No need to book an airline ticket. An email will be fine. Or the Internet. I just picked 63 basketball games over the Internet in about two minutes, so they should be able to pick one president in about the same time.

Then, maybe either Clinton or Obama can stop running for the chance to be the next name in a long line of Democratic losers, and be the first woman or the first African American President.

Why I Voted for Hillary

I just got back from my local polling place. This is the first time in memory that I am able to cast a vote for President that actually matters. Having voted in Texas or Maryland since 1986, I haven't cast many votes in races where the winner isn't known days beforehand.

But up until this morning, I didn't know which way to vote. Both Clinton and Obama are terrific candidates, and would make great presidents. Each has flaws, but I'm confident that each would put their considerable talents to work fixing the problems created by eight years of Bush and Cheney.

I finally decided on Hillary for several reasons. Here are the biggest three:

Healthcare. Both Democrats realize that Americans are hurting when it comes to healthcare. We spend more per capita than any other country, and yet 47 million Americans go without health insurance. Most of those are regular working men and women and their children. But unlike Republicans, who have little interest in fixing the problem, both Clinton and Obama have pretty elaborate plans for reforming the system. Neither plan goes as far as I'd like them to, and both plans have been criticized. Obama's plan would still leave 15 million uninsured, and Clinton's plan would mandate coverage, forcing people to take coverage even if they didn't want to. But both plans would allow health insurance to be portable, would pool private plans and create an alternative Medicare-style public plan. And both would pay for it by repealing the tax breaks that Bush gave to households making more than $250,000 per year.

The difference is not with the plans, but in the person who will have to drive them through Congress and sign them into law. Hillary is passionate about healthcare. It was her most public failure during her husband's administration, and it was one of the first issues she grabbed in this campaign. She knows from experienced the size, strength, and tactics of her opposition, from the entrenched fatcats who are growing rich from the status quo. And she won't rest until we have a plan in place to try to fix the system. It may not be perfect, but it's a far sight better than what we have now.

Iraq. Obama mentions at every opportunity that he was right on Iraq, and Hillary was wrong. But we're past the decision to go to war. We're even past the decision to bring troops home. Both Democrats have made it, and unless "Hundred Years" McCain wins the election, they'll be coming home soon after one of them takes office. But while Obama's wants them out in a year or so, save a few non-combat troops, Hillary knows that it will take much longer. There are more than 140,000 troops over there, but there are also more than 100,000 contractors, and a zillion tanks, troop trucks, planes, jeeps, and pieces of equipment that we have to bring back. To bring everyone and everything back will take time, and a year won't do it. Plus, she's allowing the generals to set the timetable, not the rest of us. As a key member of the Senate Arms Services Committee, she knows what the military needs, and can do. She has made a commitment to ending the war in Iraq, but she isn't about to get into a race to see how fast she can get everybody out. She will take a slow, organized approach, trying not to further destabilize the region. Liberals will be scratching their heads wondering why it is taking so long, but I'd feel much better about this approach.

Republicans. The third reason isn't really an issue. It's more a feeling I get when I examine both of these candidates. Obama is running on two words: change and unity. He wants to change the country by changing Washington. And how will he change Washington? That's where the unity comes in. Democrats are more alike than different, and there is really no need for all of the acrimony and harshness. Obama is clearly uninterested in going to war with Republicans; he wants to lead the whole country. "I don't want to pit Red America against Blue America," he said early in the campaign. "I want to be President of the United States of America."
Contrast that to Hillary Clinton, the Most Hates Women in country clubs and NASCAR events everywhere. She's never going to unite the country. She's never going to get Republicans to work with her. And that's fine with me.
There are two ways to get something done in Washington: compromise or win. And for the first time in a long time, we actually have a chance to win. With a Dem in the White House and solid majorities in the House and Senate, we have a chance to reverse some of the damage of the Bush Era. We have a chance to get some control over the defecit, to take some real action for the environment, and to lower the widening gap between rich and poor. Not to mention healthcare and Iraq. But we don't need a coalition-builder in the White House for that; we need a fighter. We need someone to say, "I heard the jokes. I know what you're thinking. I know that you can't stand my being here. But I'm here now, so deal with it. And maybe in four years, your party will put you here. Unless you're a Mormon, that is."

Only she won't be, of course. She won't be President. Not this year, and probably not ever. Today may be the last real day of her campaign, or maybe the last week, or the last month. But the handwriting is on the wall. Even with the superdelegates, even with 65% of the rest of the pledged delegates, even if they re-run Florida and Michigan, it won't be enough. It won't be enough to overcome the national movement that will lead to the first black man to be nominated for President, and not the first woman. But I'm fine with it. Sort of.

Campaign 2008 - This Whole Script Needs a Re-Write

With March 4th right around the corner, those long-awaited, once thought of as irrelevant state primaries in Texas and Ohio now suddenly seem to actually hold some importance, (especially for the Democrats who want to believe they actually have a nail-biter on their hands.) For the Republicans, that drama is long gone. It's McCain. It's McCain. Pundits across the TV world keep blurbing on and on about how surprising it is that more Republicans aren't pouring out in droves to help decide an already decided outcome. Go figure. You would hope that Democrats are excited about something. They have a legitimate fight on their hands for the first time since someone tried to stop Howard Dean from chanting all 50 states names. But I digress.

There is something missing in this 2008 Presidential campaign, and that is a story line. You've got some decent characters. But the darn plot line is a re-tread. Pick your theme. Us versus them. The establishment versus radical change. War versus peace. Us going after the bad guys or us sitting around hoping they leave us alone. And so on and so on. I have a theory that part of the reason the election this year is such a yawner is because of the Writer's Strike. I think not only did they abandon the TV shows, they quit writing for the candidates, and boy did it show.

But fear not, as I sat trying to find out who won some of the year's Academy Awards, while putting up with one tired political joke after another, I devised the best way to spice up things. We get some of those liberal Hollywood types to make a movie, quickly, and have it out before November.


We take the dullsville candidates of 2008 and replace them with STAR-power. And here is your cast:





Emma Thompson has already played the Hillary clone in the cult classic "Primary Colors" so she is an automatic to lead our cast. Thompson's elegance and soft appeal will come across much better than the real deal, and perhaps take away some of that "head of the PTA" edge that hits everyone in the face whenever Bill's wife speaks to the humble masses.





Then you have to have a spot for Mike Wannabee, er, I mean
Mike Huckabee. Naturally, Kevin Spacey could reprise his role
as the District Attorney from "A Time to Kill". All of those smug, clever quips would come rolling off of his tongue, and the ratings for all things political would automatically soar.
Who knows, since so many of the current candidates seem to be stealing quotes, passages and full speeches as their own, it would be easy for Spacey to throw in a few revised lines from the classic "The Usual Suspects". Imagine Spacey as Huckabee looking into the camera and saying. "Perhaps the greatest trick Hillary ever did was convincing the people that she couldn't win. "

Now, as for the actual Republican nominee, the honorable John McCain, who else to represent the staunch military, defend our nation at all costs, the lovable Colonel Nathan Jessup from one of my favorite Rob Reiner films, "A Few Good Men" Of course, I am talking about Jack Nicholson playing our GOP war hero. The dialogue almost would write itself. If Obama can avoid talking about his policies, or offering any real substance until after he KO's Mrs. Clinton, then an Obama-McCain debate would be priceless. You can already hear our war hero respond: "Son, we live in a world with walls. And those walls need to be guarded by men with guns. Whose gonna do it? You? I have the luxury of knowing things you'll never know. You weep for the hunting down and killing of terrorists and radical Islamic maniacs who want to destroy our nation. You weep for the terrorists and you curse the marines! " I already have chills just thinking about the drama that would be.

And then, of course there is everybody's flavor-of-the-month, the greatest thing since sliced bread, the Democrat momentum magnet, Barack Obama. Now, portraying him is not easy. You need a strong actor, just as good as Barack himself. He has said that he wants Will Smith to play him in a movie. Not so fast. Will Smith is drop dead attractive. He has looks on top of looks. Plus, his best roles have been portraying characters that build up America as it is, and don't want to tear it down and make it the way they see it. Then, I thought about Morgan Freeman, but aside from probably being too old, Morgan had some famous lines from the SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION, when he warned Tim Robbins to be careful, because "Hope is a dangerous thing." WHOA. That sentiment is like Bizarro Barack, the complete opposite of his canned speeches about wishing for tomorrow rather than dealing with realities of today. Nope, Morgan is out. Chris Rock is too thin.

And then it came to me. That guy from the old ALIAS television show, Carl Lumbly. I don't really remember the guys character, but I know he was reliable and spoke softly. I can't remember much of his dialogue, so that would be an easy transition to play Obama. He is tall. He is a good guy. He looks like a leader and everyone on ALIAS was always happy when he was around. Yes, Carl Lumbly pick up the phone. Your Oscar awaits.

Auditions for Obama groupies, Clinton gang, and McCain's posse should begin by April 1st. Frank Caliendo can play our current President. I'll see you AT the Movies!

It's Obama

Two things happened in the most recent string of primaries this week, the Potomac Primaries, as they are called. First was Obama’s winning margin. In Iowa, it was nine percent. In Virginia, Maryland, and DC, the average was 34%. So, not only is Obama winning more states – he has won eight since Super Tuesday – but he’s winning by significant margins, all of which is bad for Hillary.

Second is where the candidates are. Obama is continuing his state-by-state tour, delivering stump speeches every day in whatever state is voting next. Clinton is spending her time and money in Texas and Ohio in an effort to capture those big important states, but this strategy has been described accurately as “Giulian-esque.” I’m not certain if it is a money problem, or a leadership problem, or an energy problem. But it seems to me that when you start ceding states, you are facing the beginning of the end. And I’m afraid that Hillary is, like it or not.

So in a month, the rest of the world will know what you do: that the next president will either be Barack Obama or John McCain. And the campaign will move on to the next stage. Here is what you’ll see:

McCain will finally stop sucking up to conservatives. The race for the nomination is over. It was over on February 6th, when the Mittster decided to suspend his current campaign and to save his money for the 2012 race. There was a period where McCain defended himself against conservatives who claimed that he was no better than a Democrat, and he may have even convinced some. But now is the time to go after independents, Reagan Democrats, and others who make up the middle of the political spectrum. He may not be the ideal conservative, but he certainly will be the MORE conservative candidate in the race. If that’s good enough for the Bush-lovin’, pro-torture, send-the-Mexicans-home types, then he’ll have to go forward without them.

The Republican Attack Machine will start humming. Look for the name “Hussein” to show up on the Fox News ticker over and over again. Look for the “Obama is a Muslim Extremist” email in your box soon. And look for this picture over and over again:

Just remember that this picture exists too:

And finally, look for Obama to be described as “the most liberal member of the Senate.” You may remember that this tag was used successfully against John Kerry in 2004. So, by some strange coincidence, both Kerry and Obama happened to be the most liberal member of the Senate the year before they ran for President, even though both serve with Bernie Sanders of Vermont, who is a Socialist. But I’m sure the survey is completely impartial.

Lots of talk about 9/11. The current administration hasn’t helped future Republicans seeking office very much, but they’re doing what they can. One thing they’re doing is choosing this year to try six terror suspects of plotting the 9/11 attacks in a carefully-controlled military tribunal. But don’t worry, you’ll get to hear every frightening detail, all year long. The Bush Administration had more than six years to charge these guys, who were sitting in Guantanamo when they weren’t being waterboarded. But the Bushies know that more 9/11 talk in the press means more GOP votes in the ballot box, so now seems like a good time to get it done.

You will still see lot’s of Hillary – if you are Latino. The one area that Obama still struggles in with Democrats is one group that the Dems were counting on this year: Latin American voters. They make up a larger and larger portion of the electorate, eclipsing blacks in many key states. And with all of the furor over closing borders and criminalizing illegal immigration, Republicans have effectively pushed Latino voters away from the GOP. But in the Democratic primaries, they flocked to Hillary in droves, which suggests that Obama may have trouble keeping them. Look for Hillary and Bill Richardson to be working in these communities to bring up those numbers before November.

Tired of Debates? Good. You won’t see too many more. Hillary and Obama have agreed to two more, which will probably be their final two. There may be a few between McCain and Obama, but don’t expect too many. Neither of these guys like to debate, and Obama especially would rather make speeches before roaring crowds than answer questions on a stage. I for one will be glad to not-see the final one of the season.

From the Left, I’m Joe Benik.

Can I vote for Mitt Huckabee? Please?

Seriously. Consider all of the hoopla leading into Ho Hum Tuesday, what did we actually learn about the GOP? In virtually every state, educated voters on our side of the aisle wisely cast their votes for one of the two more conservative candidates (Romney and Huckabee) than John McCain. The percentage simply don't lie. Were we able to combine the two governor candidates into one super candidate, McCain would have lost Florida.

But the question I have to keep asking myself is why exactly do so many voters of the Republican party not seem to be buying into this war hero from Arizona? Is it because of his voting record? Could it be because in the past month he has been saying things about his opponents that usually spew from the mouths of doom and gloom liberals? In case you weren't listening, or perhaps had fallen asleep, I think McCain's favorite campaign buzz word was "timetables". The Dems have Barrack over there doing his Paul Simon version of "150 ways to CHANGE your country" where he says the word "change" at least 3 times per sentence, and we've got Mr. Timetable.

So, that's why we need to turn to someone from the Sci-Fi Channel to see if there is a way that the heart of the Republican party, the loyal conservatives, can finally get what they really want and need - Candidiate Mitt Huckabee!!

Imagine a guy with all the leadership experience of a governor, a clear and practical understanding of business, the economy, and a heartfelt love for our country! He would have that charismatic communication ability to deliver homilies as inspiring as Barrack and a heck of a lot more invigorating than Hillary. This candidate would also bring the real world realization that we must continue to take the fight to our attackers as opposed to sitting around holding hands, wanting the rest of the world to be our new BFF, and hope that those horrific terrorists just decide to leave us alone. Hillary's spouse tried that sitting around for 2 terms, which was just about long enough to form plans like those from that horrific Sepember.

But it looks like this ideal candidate won't be on this upcoming ballot. I have no doubt that in the days and months to follow, that war hero from Arizona will do whatever it takes to win the heart of his party, the conservative. McCain and his handlers know all too well that assuring the conservative heart is the only way he can win in November. That is, of course, unless he is lucky enough to be running against Bill's wife. That would be the best case scenario for the GOP.

Rush Hates Me, But Republicans Don't

Now that Romney has officially quit the race, the GOP is down to just one player. And conservative talk-show hosts are fuming. Rush is providing blustering, red-faced tirades that make him look like a blubbering volcano about to erupt. And Hannity, Ann Coulter, and wannabe Glenn Beck are all threatening to cast votes for Hillary if McCain is nominated. Well, guys, be careful what you promise, because guess who just lined up the nomination.

I was amazed by the blinding rage that has come from these circles. And why are they angry? Not that McCain is running for President. Not even that he called himself a conservative, which he had been doing for months. No, the ire began when it began to look like McCain would actually win. That Republican voters would take a look at guys with their brand of conservatism -- Romney, Huckabee, and Thompson -- and then pull the cord for McCain over all of them. That's what the Right Wing Chatterboxes can't get over, that after being preached to for nearly twenty years, these voters have the audacity to think for themselves.

What these guys don't understand is that there are Republicans out there, lots of them, who aren't happy with the way things are going. They've stuck with Bush and Cheney and Rumsfeld and Gonzales and Rove and Scooter Libby and the Neo-Cons and the secrecy and the incompetence and everything else that they've seen during the Bush years, and they're thinking, "enough." They are still Republicans, many would even call themselves conservatives. They still believe in limited government, low taxes, and strong defense. They still hate the idea of liberals running the show. But they also would like to see the war end someday. They quietly believe in stem-cell research and global warming. They don't believe in torture, and spying on Americans without a warrant. And they are tired of paying a fortune for healthcare, and to fill up their gas tank.

These Republicans aren't traitors to the party. It is the party that has turned on them, by locking down all discourse and turning on anyone who strayed on any issue. It wasn't long ago that Tom DeLay used to pose for pictures with a big smile and a giant hammer. But the hammer wasn't for pummeling Democrats, as many thought. It was for beating down Republicans in Congress who even considered voting against them. Well, you may be able to coerce the vote of a member of Congress, but you can't do the same to millions of Republicans in California and New York.

Fortunately for McCain, the battle is nearly over. Now that he has the nomination, he no longer has to suck up to conservatives. His speech today before the booing CPAC audience is the final apology that he'll have to make. Starting tomorrow, he'll go back to running against Democrats, and the pundits can go back to their favorite activity, attacking Clinton and Obama. And all will be right with the world again.

But I hope that McCain will remember those who screamed so passionately against his nomination, with the same long memory that they had for him. And I hope that someday they will have to explain why they turned on him.

Say Goodnight, Mitt

Mitt, it was nice knowing you. Last week, you were wondering like most other Republicans how in the world that codger McCain ever became the front-runner for the GOP Nomination. After all, you won the Michigan primary. You had the most money in the bank, the best head of hair, the Olympic resume, and the outside-Washington message that people are eating up right now. How is this doddering old fool from Arizona getting the best of me, you must have wondered. He's not even a conservative, for gosh sake.

Well, Super Tuesday was going to change that. With some help from a long and blusteringly vocal line of conservative talk-show hosts, you were going to show McCain how you True Believers play hardball. You were going to start with a win in Massachusetts, and ride this wave of right-wing animosity all the way to Utah. And when you were done, you'd be back on top, right where God wants you.

Well, some Super Tuesdays don't turn out like we plan. Sometimes Super Tuesday turns into Bummer Tuesday. Sure, you won Massachusetts and Utah, and you picked up Minnesota, Montana and Colorado. But it turns out that those states were pretty much it. Somehow, McCain won the three biggest states in the race: New York, Illinois, and California. He also won seven other states, in addition to the Big Three.

And then there is Huckabee. That guy just doesn't seem to know his place. He doesn't understand that you can't run without millions in the bank. He doesn't know that you can't run a campaign based on appealing to evangelicals. Although he may be pretty conservative too, he doesn't know when to step aside and let you have all of the anti-McCain votes. And now, it turns out that he's beaten you in West Virginia, Arkansas, Oklahoma, Alabama, Georgia, Tennessee, and Missouri. How are you supposed to win the South when the Southerner stays in the race?

And now, people are suggesting that maybe it is time for you to hang 'em up. To use your deep pockets to buy another company instead of throwing it all away on a silly pipe dream of becoming Rush Limbaugh's Great White Hope. And they may be right. It may very well be a McCain-Huckabee ticket, and there may be nothing that you can do or buy that will change that. But facing reality is not your strong suit. After all, you're a conservative.

Finally Something Super??? Don't Tease Me

It's a funny thing about our culture, we just love superlatives. Its a marketing age friends and if your product, candidate, or party do not come up proceeded by such terms as Big, New, Super, or Improved......well, you just don't get a second glance in todays helter skelter world. Case in point, this past Sunday, estimates are telling us that more homes had their televisions tuned into the Super Bowl than any other TV program in history. The viewership for Super 42 came out ahead of the timeless TV Finale for MASH! Say it ain't so Joe!
And what did we tune in for? A comedy of errors. A supposedly superior Perfect Patriots team that somehow came out and played like the NY Jets. Maybe they did spend too much time watching those video tapes?? Some will call it an "upset for the ages" (those are Giants fans) but I think the largets viewership in some time actually laid witness to a Patriots team playing down to its competition. But, alas we all took the bait. But will this Super Duper Tuesday offer any more reason for drama or a down-to-the-wire "cliffhanger" finish? Somehow I think not.

On the Democrat side you've got too diametrically opposed forces in the Fair Maiden of Stability in Hillary Clinton versus the Crown Prince of Change in Barrack Obama. Both deserving party nominess and both with totally different styles. Hillary represents that "old guard" charisma that helps many in the Liberal camp sleep more soundly at night. Obama stands for that resonating new voice that echoes in the wind. He is that breath of fresh air. The guy sounds great and gives marvelous soundbites. He apparently "found his voice" right out of the womb.

Then for the Republicans, its seems to all be done but the counting. For reasons inapparent to me, the GOP seems content to roll over and support John McCain. He of the war hero, I love America mold. Lately, he has evoked much of the rhetoric and reason of the Republican icon, Ronald Reagan, minus the personality. Is it me or does McCain just come across like that cranky grandpa from the old TV show Soap?? Since winning Florida, McCain has swooped up endorsements from all over the place. Rudy and Arnold are on his side! I think if they could get a microphone up to heaven the GOP would try to get a Ronald Reagan endorsement, though with one look at the Arizona senator's recent history in politics, I doubt that endorsement would ever come. I have been leaning towards Mitt Romney, that successful business fellow who just happens to be a Mormon. Early on, I was hoping that good ole Fred Thompson would leap out of that Tower from the 2nd Die Hard movie and steamroll through the field. But Fred never did leap anywhere, and the momentum train never left the station. Then, Mike Huckabee got my attention when he won "President of Iowa", but even his Kevin Spacey-like delivery could not garner enough support away from McCain.

Soooo, we wait. A lot of the moderate Republicans and just about every network media outlet has been telling America that McCain has it wrapped up, and he probably does. The burning question for this fan of the process is why we settled so soon. I, like many on my side, wish that Mike Huckabee would have dropped out with Rudy, because I believe that those who vote for him would have fallen Romney's way if he were out. For some reason, Huckabee remains. Perhaps his reward will be Vice President. Fo now, I will sit and wait and see if this Super Duper Tuesday lives up to the hype.

Super Duper Tuesday!

Well, the day is finally here. All the debates, polls, speeches, punditry, debates, gossip, private planes, shaking hands, and debates bring us to today. Super Tuesday is the day that voters in more than 24 states makes their choices among the remaining Democrats and Republicans in the race. A month ago, there were like ten candidates in only one state, and a small one at that. Now there are only four or five stretched among 24 states, plus American Samoa. Who came up with this system?

In the Republican race, I think McCain is going to roll through today with a big, wincing smile on his battle-scarred face. He won't win the whole thing today, but he'll cement is lead in the race to such an extent that he'll be nearly impossible to catch. And Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter and the good folks on Fox News can all scratch their heads and wonder why Rebublicans aren't listening to them anymore.

In the Democratic race, Hillary was waaaaaay out in front, and expected to win today. But the Big Mo has been with the Big O, and I think Obama will catch her narrowly. But so many states are proportional states, that it will still be very, very close. Hillary may even retain the lead, when the expected superdelegates are counted. This battle will last at least another month, and either side can still win.

Vince, what do you think? Are you among the True Conservatives who can't imagine a War Hero with the gall to stand up to the Bushies representing your party? Do you think Hillary or Obama will win tonight? And whom would you rather face in the General Election? Enquiring minds want to know.

From the Left, I'm Joe Benik.